Just when you thought "The Village" was the dumbest script ever, good ol' Night comes out and tops it. Yes, kids, "The Lady in the Water" is the dumbest movie in history. Moreover, it is pretentious at the same time. I was so stunned that I stayed for the whole thing. And I kept thinking, "Night broke up with Disney for this! For this!" The only good thing about it was the unintentional comedy of Night's role as the unrecognized genius who's writing a political treatise called "The Cookbook." Clearly, this is how he envisions himself after nobody recognized the brilliance of "The Village." It almost makes me want to watch the (unintentionally) hilarious beginning of "Lady" again, to see the little stick figures of "man" and the water creatures and hear the inane story of how "man" has always fought wars.
No, I said "almost." I said "almost." Stop! No, please, stoooopppppppp!